*Call Ronn Owens and tell him how much he makes you quiver now. Tell him when he reads the mattress ad, you get real romantic. If you're a guy, perhaps enhance it with the disclosure that the word, "temperpedic", gives you a Woodie.
*Call Jared and say, "Jared, you have revolutionized radio, 4.0.--without you, we wouldn't have giants like, Mike Bower, Karel, the Monte Show and Renee Richardson." Whisper through the phone, "Jared, will you please kiss my 'I Heart Radio' bumper sticker with the Cumulus logo?" He just might sing to you.
*Blow a kiss to Bill Bungeroth and say you got your delicious chocolate candy not from your boyfriend, but from a SweetJack special.
*Kneel beneath the royal ground of Jan Wahl and recite the King's Speech in its entirety.
*Have rough sex with a Comcast SportsNet Bay Area Insider. (They might use it on the Blitz).
*Tell your honey, "Baby, I do love you--you are my guiding inspiration, my soul mate, my treasure cove, but I have to confess: I'm not ready for the responsibility--there's a new love in my life: 'Armstrong and Getty'."
*Ruminate spiritually with Gary Radnich. Spread the gospel. Sing to him and send him a note that has pictures of Willie Brown, Dick Zinn, and Janice Huff on it.
*Drop off a $50 gift certificate at Hooter's for Darya Folsom.
*Blow a kiss to Fitz and Brooks, then immediately begin cackling for twenty-odd minutes.
*Take a $2 bill and insert it into any traffic reporter at Metro. Explain that "it's the thought that counts." They will most likely use that as inspiration and become the next OSH super commuter.
*Whisper sweet nothings into the ear of Steve Moskowitz and avoid an audit.
*Ladies, secretly seduce Damon Bruce...do a Nooner wearing nothing but a SweetJack sweater and San Jose State football undies.
*Rap violently and break dance on the floor for Jon Bristow.
*Send a picture of your dog and cat to Jon Carroll.
*Special delivery an 880 big rig to Kim Wonderly.
*Send a voice to CW Nevius, Ray Ratto, and every KGOne chef.
*Get several after-dinner mints and coffee samplers to Eric Byrnes.
*Comp the entire KRON bosses with anger management classes at USF.
Happy Valentine's Day.
*Follow me on Twitter
Hi all,
ReplyDeleteFYI, I'm pretty sure that Sleep Train is using an audio snippet from Family Guy without permission.
(mommy, mommy, etc.)
Highly entertaining Rich... you *do* know that "I heart radio" is a wholly owned product of Clear Channel... right? Sort of their 'sweetjack' if you will.... I don't think Jared snuggles with it...
ReplyDeletehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/IHeartRadio
Give Tori Campbell and Pam Cook $200 gift certificates to Vidal Sassoon, $1000 at Bloomingdales and $500 at Sephora. Get out of 1990 and into 2012 please. You are more dated than my first box of chocolates. Love ya girls!
ReplyDeleteSend Rod Brooks "Hooked on Phonics". When he reads an ad he sounds like a deaf person speaking. You know what I mean.
ReplyDeleteMy Valentine is to Ronn ("I really like this new format") Ownes.
ReplyDeleteFor all the time you spent discussing the super bowl commericals.
Ronn did you know the game was decided within the last two minutes?
Were you paying attention?
Do you follow football or watch TV commericals?
Raddy gave Larry his Valentines day present. That racist bigoted thing that got Kreuger fired? Wasn't his fault. No,"If you knew the whole story"..says Radman..then double talks and mumbles instead of telling us the whole story.
ReplyDeleteMaybe Larry made a comeback because of the huge lack of respect for latino's by KNBR and Larry Baer. Baer who froze out Damon Bruce for being a critic of Sabean,stepped aside at a voice of hatred towards the Giants latin players.
Bill Bunghole,Lee Hammer de fuhrer,and Baer are not liberals. THAT'S why Krueger weaseled back on air.
Thankyou for not metioning Darya,she gives me a chubby. Thats just not right. It should be Gasia.
ReplyDeleteRich,
ReplyDeleteNoticed that you (in passing) made a reference to Al Hart: "pray for Al Hart."
I have always admired the man as being the epitome of a class act in radio reporting. Hope all is well with him, I realize he is getting up in years.
Any more on this??
How about a $500 gift certificate to both Larry and Raddy to Weight Watchers!
ReplyDeleteAnybody ever comment why Ann Notorangelo always has bloodshot eyes?...One toke over the line sweet Jesus,one toke over the line...
ReplyDeleteTo Jan Wahl...the boxed DVD set of the short-lived TV series "Valentine's Day" (1964-65, about a Manhattan
ReplyDeletepublishing house). Jan can cite it in her next Sleep Train commercial..."That debo-naih. chah-ming Tony Franciosa in New Yawk..."
@5:57PM - Your reference points musically are only about 4 decades old. Good to see your hanging in there with contemporary music & culture. Keep on trucking, that's a gas, rolling' doobies. Hey Rip Van Winkle just woke up from 1972.
ReplyDeleteTo Jeff Bell, KCBS: A medical fix for that absurdly squeaky-in-the-spirit-of-being-"conversational" voice.
ReplyDeleteHair plugs for Ronn and the Radman, Milk of Magnesia for Jared because he is full of S----
ReplyDeleteLarry Krueger who ripped Lowell Cohn,went after Hank Schulman today saying he's a Giants writer with a hot dog in his back pocket..Schulman took offense and called Kreuger " A brain dead tool"
ReplyDeleteWhan Hank is right,he's right.