Friday, February 15, 2019

I'm Declaring a National Emergency on Bay Area Media

Related image TO RID THE REGION OF...

*"Smurph and Paulie Crap" on KNBR's continuing embarrassment in the morning, a program so bad it has to hire Uber drivers to occasionally fill in as producers. Smurph, devoid of his inner Giants, UCLA, hard-on, is why you should never send your kids to Marin schools; they may end putting pineapple on a pizza for Paulie Crap, this is what happens when you sniff too much paint in grammar school.

*Liam Maycleam, KPIX' so-called, "foodie chap", he of the Guinness-stench, Irish accent to make him sound legitimate. Maycleam is to sophisticated food is Jeffrey Dahmer is to the Donner Party.

*Stan Bunger and Susan Leigh Taylor, the suddenly chatty gruesome twosome on KCBS' increasingly inane morning drive show, a program that used to deliver breaking news and traffic and weather, but now, thanks to a corporate takeover by dim-witted Entercom, has thrust this once-mighty radio news giant into a cacophony of morning noise ads; Bunger's penchant to drone on and on about weather events (something he thinks he knows so he pontificates weather "events", "impulses, etc) Leigh Taylor is worse with her STUPID questions and attempts at humor which amount to a lesser, news version of Jan Wahl: translation? Leigh Taylor isn't funny and should stick to telling us time and time again, "I noticed some moisture on my windshield on the drive up from the peninsula."

*The "Ronn Owens Report" on KGO Radio. Owens nine-minute assault on the senses isimportant so Ronnnnnnnnnn can get out of the house and finance a few manicure/pedicures and lunch with his great "pal", Copie, aka: Brian Copeland, the latter currently suing Cumulus and KGO so he can continue to produce and star in local plays that no one watches. Not genuine at all.

*Kars4Kids, Peterson Dean, Dinovite, all Gold investment spots: these obnoxious ads should be rid of any human ear contact for life otherwise just go ahead and BAN AM Radio for the good of the people.

*Darya Folsom. I don't have to say another word.

*Ryan Scott: see above.

*Larry Beil: Getting more egotistical by the day. If Beil keeps this up, he's destined for Akron.

*Sam Spear: Who thought this horseracing guy was interesting for radio interviews? Oh yeah, Smurph and Crap. Spear was last relevant during the Carter administration. His voice has all the conviction of a Yuba City McDonalds.

*Mark Ibanez: after 40 years at KTVU, Mark developed an ego and is suddenly high and mighty. Maybe he's been too imbedded with the Napa cannabis community.

*Heather Holmes: OK, so I'm delighted you've toned down the Marina chick on a date look but please, did you have to now start buying your dresses at Ross?

*Claudine Wong: I don't get it (wait, I do) Wong's 20-year record of never smiling would make her the perfect candidate for Alan Martin's interviews on PIX.

*Ama Daetz: so you have a beautiful body and relatively decent delivery but the personality of a Fresno raisin.

*Tracey Watkowski-Silva: OK, so you have this penchant for wanting to be in total control, I'm hip to that, sort of akin to thinking shingles is nothing but a few blisters.

*Brian Copeland. Pre Cosby drama: "I've opened for Bill Cosby! and washed his slippers!" Post-Cosby drama: "Bill Cosby. Who's that?"

*Chris Townsend: great, so you work for a baseball team without a radio station and a front man that talks like the Petersen Dean guy, wonderful, maybe we should all just fuck sleeping and stream for the rest of our life.

*Damon Bruce: a guy who thinks his farts are more important then mankind. Please, buddy boy, get off your high horse and have a few more beers with your wife otherwise you'll turn into Larry Krueger.

*Frank Somerville. Jesus, Frank, I don't give a shit who you're shtuping, just be consistent...and QUIT talking to Mark. And Mark? Those texts? I thought you were a lot smarter.

*Kenny Wardell: See, Kenny, there was a time when you could legitimately kiss Ronnnnnnnnnnnn's ass when Ronn was relevant only Ronnnnnnnnnn is now less relevant then Joe Starkey's termite commercials.

*Doug Harvill: Yeah, you really improved KGO --nice to know Cumulus still has that, "let's keep on hiring middle-aged white men who don't know shit about radio but will kiss major ass and metaphorically blow brown steam up Ben Fong Torres arse."

*The Bay Area Radio Hall of Fame: question: who have you not nominated? Stan Bunger's toe fungus?

*The "KSFO Morning Show" on KKKSFO: "we go to Albert in San Leandro who wants to talk about the wall." "Hi Brian, I'm a 74 year-old White man who drives a truck and eats Cheetos!" "Love your show."

*"Armstrong and Getty"--Conscience of the Nation? Or, more likely, Constipation of the West.

*Ethan Bearman: where's Jack Kevorkian when you need him?

*John Rothmann: Ronn Owens' sloppy seconds. 

Tuesday, February 12, 2019

There's Not Enough Women at KCBS; Fire The Men; Not a Crisis Yet But Who Knows in the Future; A Possible Solution

Image result for Girl power KCBS has a BIG PROBLEM: namely, not enough women on the roster; except for...

Susan Leigh Taylor, Holly Quan, Rebecca Corral, Jennifer Hodges, Megan Goldsby, Carrie Hodousek, Susan Kennedy, Kim Wonderley, Cheryl Rains, Patty Reising, Margie Shafer, Melissa Culross, Sherry Brown, Betsy Gebhardt, Jennifer Seelig, Jan Wahl...

Just a shortage of women, you see.

Which means forces are in action to improve the situation.

Too many men means making tough decisions, options include:

canning nighttime sports guy, Bruce Macgowan and fellow man, weekend sports anchor, Joe Salvatore. The idea: let Jan Wahl do sports on the weeknight (and a bonus?-- more movie reviews and sports from a different angle; the woman! angle.)

Also, ace out Stan Bunger, John Atkinson, and Kevin the Rat: let Goldsby do those chores because she's really not on the air that much and that would improve KCBS women air talent morale.

The bottom line: There's just not enough women at KCBS. It's not a crisis yet but it could be.

Saturday, February 9, 2019

415 Media Exclusive: Deanno/ KPIX Close To Hybrid News/Weather Anchor Gig Only Sticking Point Money; Saturday PM Post

Image result for Paul Deanno
Paul Deanno
PAUL DEANNO is close to becoming a hybrid KPIX anchor; he's been doing weather regularly on weeknights and has occasionally filled in on the news desk.

I TOLD YOU KPIX upper mgt. brass were so impressed with Deanno's news anchoring that they approached him about a regular gig--as a fulltime news anchor and/or weather anchor.

Whatever the case, Deanno is great in both roles. Now it appears, Deanno is close to doing both. In fact,  both sides are close to making it happen.

A potential sticking point? Money.

Deanno is making pretty good dough as chief weather meteorologist --but wants more compensation if he is to also do news. That's not unreasonable and so what's the big deal?

When it comes to money it's always a big deal. I don't think it's enough to derail the project but I've always said, I'm not surprised at anything anymore. I'll be on this as usual.

Friday, February 8, 2019

Jason Brooks Droning at KCBS; 30 Rock Wants Raj Mathai But They'll Have to Wait; Ken Wayne KRON Experiment Not So Smooth; 415 Media Friday

Image result for Jason Brooks KCBS
Jason Brooks
HE JUST KEEPS GOING AND GOING AND GOING...Nobody doubts the business expertise of KCBS money reporter, Jason Brooks. He's on top of it from early morning to late afternoon.

But the voice. The vanilla monotony that dulls the senses. Yes, I'm getting personal, of course I am.

Brooks' voice drones on and on almost like a robotic bot that sounds almost computer-like. Brooks doesn't have to sound hysterical; he's positively blase. But it would be wise of him to pick it up a notch and get away from the monotone buzz switch. It's downer-central. And I'm being kind.

*Speaking of KCBS, their morning cacophony of ENDLESS commercial spots has begun to cause ear aches. It's especially evident after the prolific traffic reports where four-minute clusters of continuous ads borders on obnoxious. Sure, you have to pay the bills but this form of commercial spot overkill amounts to greed personified.

*Once again the rumor mill has heated up over the status of lead NBC Bay Area anchor, Raj Mathai, as the 30 Rock News folks are hot on the trail of Mathai who seems pretty much set to remain in the Bay Area and San Jose specifically. But while his partner, Jessica Aguirre, is working without a long-term contract, Mathai not only signed a long-term extension, but one which had several zeros in it and makes Raj near the territory of Frank Somerville at KTVU and Dan Ashley at KGO.. (The latter nearing his own extension which could make him the undisputed salary king of Bay Area TV News) And well deserved.
Image result for Raj Mathai NBC
Raj Mathai with wife and newest family member

Mathai seems to me to not want any part of NY even if it means working in Manhattan amping up his career, which it most certainly would. Mathai has a growing family and is quite settled down in the South Bay. A network gig might be prestigious now but Mathai could wait until his kids get older and then migrate to the east. Then, the money will be even better and his family situation is more ready for the move to Gotham.

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Ken Wayne
*Nearing a year with KRON, Ken Wayne's migration to the albatross station hasn't produced any iota of buzz whatsoever, in fact, ratings are pretty much stagnant. Wayne left KTVU when they didn't offer him a contract extension (and took a massive pay cut). Seems his gig at KRON would be more conducive for the soft-spoken Wayne but that's not the case.

Wayne is a steadying anchor, for sure, but excitement is not his greatest virtue. He makes departed Steve Aveson look like a relative Ron Burgundy.

Thursday, February 7, 2019

The Dysfunction that is KPIX; Watts' Leaving Further Muddies 855 Battery; Sweeps Makes It Worse; KCBS Yappers Mary Lee and Hodousek Torture Chamber; Schulman/Chronicle Steal From Me; KTVU's Gomez Non-Street Savvy; Katsuyama Screams at SF Fire Scene; Gonzales and King Factoid; Thursday 415 Media

Image result for kpix building san francisco "THE ONLY FUNCTION HERE IS DYSFUNCTION." That from one of the growing dissatisfied staffers at KPIX --where incoherence and incompetence rules the day.

To emphasize the current disarray, PIX just lost Julie Watts to their CBS counterpart in Sacramento. There are more moves from Pixies on the way, just in time for February Sweeps. How timely.

Watts wasn't one of KPIX's star players but she was big enough to warrant a lot of chatter last (Wednesday) night amongst some of the local CBS' most influential people, both on and off the air. One management figure tried to spin the Watts' move as simply a colleague "not leaving; instead just 'staying in the CBS family in Sacramento'". Yeah right, what a completely, utter sense of bullshit. And that's exactly how it was received by the rank and file.

As I've stated countless times, KPIX has NO IDENTITY. Very little leadership too. Constant conflict is not a help, particularly in the morning. Growing dissatisfaction and lack of morale is PIX's only consistent virtue.  It's a good thing the station is owned by deep pockets CBS but that's hardly a booster inside the building at 855 Battery.

Watts herself was mostly disliked by a majority of the staff --this incident especially but she was high profile enough to garner industry respect and seven Emmys too. Leaving the Bay Area for Sacramento is not that uncommon these days with the locals eyeing its relative affordability especially real estate. That said, Watts decision to leave SF and go up north primarily because she hated PIX' direction and wanted more investigative reporting makes Channel 5 look bad. Looks can be deceiving only in this case it is absolutely true and for PIX, a bad omen. Trust me.

Mary Lee
Mary Lee
*This would be real torture: Put KCBS reporter, Carrie Hodousek and morning weather anchor, Mary Lee, in the same room together. The endless shrieking would be unbearable. Lee sounds exactly like Hodousek or is it the other way around? Either way, the shrieking violets cause eternal ear damage.

*Please, I could care less that some nobody on the night shift on KNBR was given a pink slip. I don't listen to that garbage unless there's some CBS Sports Radio content on the air but that too can be painful.

*Memo to Hank Schulman of the Chronicle: It was 415 Media that reported first, this news.

Schulman stealing from me, imagine that. Damn bloggers!

Image result for alyana gomez ktvu
Alyana Gomez
*It was a pleasant sight viewing Alyana Gomez reporting live from the scene of that big fire in SF on Wednesday --too bad Gomez mispronounced several city street names and kept referring to "Geary Street" --locals know it as "Geary Boulevard." Trivial? No, because it's called knowing your geography and city. How damn irritating but that's just me. I would hope and prefer as gorgeous and infinitely watchable Gomez is, it would help if her street savvy were genuine.

*Then there's  Jana Katsuyama on the scene who appeared to think literally screaming and yelling would heighten the story when it was stated from the beginning that no one was hurt or injured or killed, thank god, only buildings were destroyed.

Image result for jana katsuyama
Jana Katsuyama
Katsuyama's loud outbursts did nothing to inform the viewers on KTVU but only reinforces how bad a reporter she is and why KTVU management thinks she's talented is beyond me. Maybe mediocrity rules the day and this is the best they got which apparently it is and gosh does that nauseate me.

*Between the "flipping houses" moron and "Petersen Dean" jerkoff, my has AM Radio become such a mess.

*If Roberta Gonzales truly wanted to come back to KPIX, she could. Her problem, sorta like Dana King, is that both left wanting to pursue their own independence, in King's case, a desire to become an artist; in Roberta's case to become her own broadcast boss. Problem is, both are not earning anywhere near what they got at PIX; not that the money was great but it was far more then they're making now. Yeah, money isn't everything but it's damn near close.
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Dana King

Wednesday, February 6, 2019

415 Media Exclusive: Julie Watts Leaving KPIX. Headed To Sacramento CBS 'Oand O' KOVR

Image result for Julie Watts KPIX
Julie Watts leaving KPIX for KOVR


Julie Watts, the wholesome, sometimes consumer, sometimes weather anchor, is leaving KPIX and headed for Sacramento CBS O and O (Owned and Operated) KOVR.

KPIX brass let their staff know this (Wednesday) evening, according to a source close to the station. That same source told me the news and a little more too:

"She wasn't happy here and wanted to do more consumer and investigative stories, said the person who is in a position to know.

Watts has been at KPIX since 2010. Her reporting garnered seven Emmys and numerous industry awards. Presumably, in hungry Sacramento, she'll be able to do more and get extra air time; it's unusual for a smaller market to snatch a Top 10 personality like Watts but that's what Sactown CBS did.

Good for Watts and good for CBS and its state capital eyeball.

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Saturday, February 2, 2019

Saturday Brunch; The State of 415 Media; Tooting my Horn Because if I Didn't, Who Would? Reality Time

Image result for Press Hat in a bar SATURDAY BRUNCH


I always try to be honest and edgy, not to be shock for shock's sake. If I'm guilty of anything it's that I'm not honest enough. And if that means losing a friend, then so be it. I don't have any real friends anyways because friendship is such an overrated deal. Friends are those that take the initiative and act, not react.

True friends do extraordinary things and favors and are not expecting anything back. They just do it. It's not something spelled out. I don't want nor seek friends in writing this blog. Its main intent, and by extension, my intent is to provide an entertaining read and be as honest and blunt as possible.

Because this business involves massive egos and untold inner circle material, sure there's a few people that are off limits but they are in the minority. In fact, one who I counted as a "friend" turned on me and it was totally out of the blue. It's a good thing the individual really doesn't matter --by the way, no guesses, I'm not in the mood.

*Saturday morning. Coffee is strong and black. The rain has subsided which I knew would happen when the weather folks said we'd have a massive storm and wind galore. If they got paid on the basis of accuracy, they'd go bankrupt.

Back to this blog. I'm kvetching today which is nothing unusual because I kvetch for a living (another story one day soon) ; there's very little money in the checking account and once again I have to figure it out if this project is all worth it. I've thought about pitching advertising because my numbers are there and I'm the only guy in town that does this but that requires time and money and I have little. So I hope upon hope that those of you that come here regularly and even those of you that are new, would make a donation and/or subscribe so I can buy coffee and eat out every now and then. It's a great feeling to be able to eat.

*My blog, 415 Media, was intended to be a fast, breezy read based on the media/TV/Radio/Print biz coming and goings. But that's really in the background now because in the Internet age nobody really gives a shit about most media minutiae. That's why most of it is in the trades which is mostly read only by those in the biz. You can't pay for coffee and toilet paper if you stay squarely on biz items.

You need to have an edge. You need to be creative. I'm all for pissing off the people (mostly anonymous) cretins who regularly lecture me that I've committed major sins for my constant skewing and venom directed at the various worker bees, anchors, news guys, sports guys, weather people, writers, etc. I try not mince words and I have a hard time, sometimes, being tame. Some of you people call it insulting and disgusting, I call it my vision and you don't have to agree nor like it or me for that matter because, as I said, I'm not looking for friends. Frankly, friendship is overrated. It is one of the core reasons why our world is so fucked up now. With friends like we have now, who needs enemies. Friendship got us Trump. How's that been working out?

So belittle me, insult me, call me a Jew bastard, lecture my audacity to request donations to keep this blog afloat because I know I'm striking a nerve when I'm inundated with such muck. In fact, it makes me want to muck more and by god, do I have a knack for mucking. Fine, it beats reading press release Benny Fong Torres.

Oh my God, I wrote that some anchor is getting a divorce! How cruel. How thoughtless. How arrogant. Sue me. Good luck on getting a dime too. Public people are public. They knew the deal going in. It's part of having everyone in the living room being a part of your life. That's why you get pretty good money to read the teleprompter. It could be worse. You could be a roofer in Livermore during the summer. It sure beats working for a living. And you don't have to lift.

Once I had a well-known anchor in this area complain to me that "I didn't make your worst list, etc." He wasn't kidding. He gets it. I laughed at his proclamation but I understand. People read me and I'm proud of that and I'm also happy that there's a great amount of people that love and look forward to my read because it makes them giggle every now and then and so, giggle away.

I never said I was perfect and always maintained this is a blog and not the NY Times. Most of you get it, some, well, you can't please 'em all. If KQED can have over a hundred pledge breaks a month (maybe more) then I'm allowed to ask for money too. Unlike KQED, which is worth north of $500 million bucks, I've got limited funds but better material. KQED has cheap coffee mugs and a fake restaurant show. Local programming? Gimme a break. KQED has more slush funds then the Trump administration.

This is my life now. I dedicate a lot of time and effort to make this site worth reading. Yes, every now and then, I phone it in but that's rare. I need items just like Caen used to say and he had over seven assistants. So if you know something or someone getting busy, send me a tip ( And another thing: PLEASE, if you have the means to make a donation, or subscribe, and you like coming here or even if you don't, if you help me, you'll get the best blog possible (scroll down the right side to you see the "pay pal" "donate" icon and follow directions, it's quick and easy.

LET ME REPEAT: I DO NOT APOLOGIZE FOR ASKING FOR DONATIONS. So go ahead and send in your insults and berate me (which makes me laugh since the biggest complainers are the ones who visit this blog every day) Imagine that!

In the meantime, have a great day. Enjoy February. Enjoy the rain. And thanks for reading 415 Media where pissing off the masses rules the day, friendship or not.