Thursday, April 7, 2016

The Next Generation of Bullshit; Ray Ratto Is At The Ball Park; Radnich Too (Stop The Presses); Brian Murphy's Woody; 'Kuip's Geared Up'; Larry Baer Had a Dream; Play Ball

 THURSDAY

In order to really care about the well-being of an announcer who sells mattresses and calls in "sick" for some gimmicky reason, one would have to CARE about that person and his issues in life.

I've moved on.

Really.

The product no longer merits my attention; get a grip, people--breathe a little.

*The "Next Generation of Bullshit"--OK, I'll give you this nugget about mattress man: something is up. But too early to talk about it here, I'm sure when the dust settles 'yall will know.

*I tried, religiously, to dump AM radio for a day and migrate to NPR and KQED --which is essentially listening to chime bells in between erudite news and "information." So, yes, it sucks too.

*Go to Internet radio and listen to some cool stations around the country. Buy Satellite for your car. It's only about 20 bucks and you'll get some variety --not a molecule of the "Next Generation of Bullshit" --which is good for your health and happiness --you won't have to hide the children.

PLAY BALL!

*Tough day for Radnich; he actually has to get out of bed and attend a sporting event. Stop the presses.

*To celebrate "Opening Day", KNBR and the Giants will add another 20 minutes of commercials to the Post-Game crap, uh, wrap --your calls and reaction will commence around 11: 50 PM just in time for Giants Re-Play.

*"Kuip" is really geared up for the wrap: he's gonna eat 4 extra-large bags of peanuts and bury his nose in the microphone --because, well, it's the Giants way.

*To be serious for a change, the Giants PR machine --otherwise known as Larry Baer's vocal chords and the KNBR airwaves, begins its 24/7 infomercial today until October. Or, to be more precise: about the same length of time it takes Larry Krueger to talk out of both sides of his mouth.

*Brian Murphy got a serious woody last night: he actually slept in his combo UCLA/Giants jersey and woke up yelling and screaming "Hunter Pence, Lee Hammer!!, --Hunter Pence, Lee Hammer!"

Ray Ratto can only fit three fingers on the microphone. Goddamn. That's what he gets for blocking me. #Heavyweight http://t.co/wRLOe3AL*"Hi, I'm Ray Ratto, you know, doing a #2 at the AT&T Press Box bathroom is not as easy as it looks."

*Ray is not auditioning for the new kids in town and their next generation of bullshit.

*Big day for Kate Scott: between wifey, friends, and the post-game beer bong, lots of corduroy!

*Kate and Gary Radnich are still feuding --reportedly he told the Katesker: "You know, if I liked 'white women', you'd be first on my list!" --to which Scott yelled back, "Nobody Cares!"

*Larry Baer: "I've never met a KNBR woman intern I didn't like!"

*Larry once tried to convince the Giants ownership group to erect (no pun) a statue of a KFOG intern.

*Big news around the ballpark: the Giants have installed ATMs in the restrooms --I'm kidding of course but Baer just thought: "You know, that's not such a bad idea!"

*It figures that in the Tenderloin, the hookers have begun handing out pamphlets detailing the next generation of rubbers.

*PLAY BALL!

*Follow me on Twitter

35 comments:

  1. Radnich was at the ball park?????

    Could he even find it without the the help of the navigation on his Bentley?

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  2. Vocal Chords?? E-flat? A-natural? C-sharp?

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  3. Ray Ratto might be the worst sports radio broadcaster in Bay Area history.

    Ball park is a good place to be. Lee Hammer was there when half of the Cumulus employees were fired.

    "OPERATIONS MANAGER"

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    Replies
    1. Hammer is a turd. Hasn't changed the programming in ages and it sounds that way. If not for successful teams he would be out of a job. Talk about a rabbit's foot up your ass.

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  4. Lots of corduroy, and lots of friends. Because SHE IS Kate T Scott, VIP and star of the show (any show)!

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  5. "doing a #2 at the AT&T Press Box bathroom is not as easy as it looks."

    I know a driveway that needs refreshing.

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    Replies
    1. I'll be there in 10 min, Karel...have some snacks ready for me.

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  6. Frances SwaggartApril 7, 2016 at 9:31 AM

    I swear, Ray Ratto looks like he & Bernie are brothers!!

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  7. Why is this blog so angry all the time?

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    Replies
    1. Sunshine, butterflies, and snowflake thoughts can be found on the entire rest of the Internet.

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    2. Yeah, but pure bitterness is just plain ugly.

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    3. "Yeah, but pure bitterness is just plain ugly."

      And here you are!

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  8. If Raddy is at the park, some serious sistah booty can't be far away.

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  9. Couldn't handle listening to Radnich this morning. He's once again losing his voice. Nothing but a raspy, croak. Made me want to clear my own throat. This happens to him about 4 or 5 times a year. Betcha tomorrow is a "sick day."

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  10. Two thoughts: 1) Even the Cloud Clowns have to kiss up to Mr. Baer; and 2) I'm extremely impressed that Murphy's better half (he actually has one, believe it or not) hasn't called out this blog. Maybe posts like this recent one keeps her from responding and off-balance.

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  11. For Ray Ratto, doing a deuce is a hard thing for him. His ass is so big that he can't spread his buttcheeks to give his pie hole some air.

    KNBR is nauseating. I can't even listen to that station. It is the biggest collection of sophomoric rah-rahs around. Everyone who works drinks the Giants Kool-Aid. They can never do anything wrong. What's going to happen if they don't win the World Series in an even-numbered year? Babies will still cry. Dogs will want to take walks. The homeless will still be begging on street corners.

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    Replies
    1. The Giant's will be mediocre this year, .500 ball at best. More and more empty seats BUT the lying scumbags will announce yet another sell out. Total Bull Shit. Go A's!!

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  12. Overwhelmed by hunger pangs, Fatto breaks down and power gorges the CSNBA stick mic.

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  13. KTVU has a one hour noon broadcast today mostly covering the Giants. Talk about jumping on board the bandwagon. I wonder if they forgot the A's are based five miles away from their studio because they didn't make a big deal about their home opener earlier this week

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    Replies
    1. I'm sure that's at Fox's insistence. (Giants over A's.) Bigger market.

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  14. Just curious, Rich. Is there anything or anyone in present times that you like and aren't bitter about? If TV and radio are this horrible to you and most of your readership, why don't you just stop listening/viewing? Life's too short to watch/listen to things you so intensely despise.

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    Replies
    1. Just consider this "alternative media".

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  15. Please! More posts and scathing screeds on the buffoonery that is the smurph and mook show! Always enjoy.

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  16. Luckily, my commute is short nowadays because Murph and Mac were at their unctious and sycophantic best - On my 10 minute drive to pick up my son and take him to school, I had to listen to Murph get angry at his boss, make shout outs to their few fans, give airtime to a guy who'd been drinking since 4 am, repeat himself, and entreat the fans to yell - there was no sports talk at all. Driving home for lunch, I heard Radnich ask three guests if Pagan should be angry at batting eighth. All said no. They should lock all these guys in a room and make them watch Mike and Mike for a week.

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  17. RL hates it when anyone else enjoys themselves.

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  18. This is my favorite video about Bob Fitzgerald's homerism. NBA Commissioner David Stern dropped by the local broadcast. He compliments Barnett, but calls Fitzgerald a homer. You know you're a homer when the league commissioner calls you that: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d3xyquHz0ks

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  19. I refuse to listen the KNBR lovefest with the Giants.
    All we need now, if for the Chronicle editorial board to wave those banners as well.

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  20. Seriously, how can anyone can sit and listen to Ratto?

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  21. CSN Giants televised games now have a light gray score box in the top left corner of the screen. The score box has always been there however they have changed the colors and it is very hard to read now. Rich, do you know who would be the best to contact for this type of complaint? I know it isn't a big deal however very annoying.

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    Replies
    1. Try contacting @CSNGiants or @SFGiants on twitter.

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  22. Congratulations, Rich, on your recent record-setting hits on the website. I heard about it!

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  23. The photo posted here, is this the gathering of Homer Central?

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  24. Grown men wearing other grown men's uniform jerseys bugs the heck out of me. I haven't worn some guy's jersey since I was 12.

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  25. Rich, if anyone knew this story, you'd be the one, but I heard from very reliable sources that a number of years ago, Larry Baer kept hitting on this producer at KNBR until she finally got so upset she practically had a nervous breakdown and had to leave the bay area. Any truth to this sordid tale?

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  26. I stopped listening to 'homer' PC giants announcers of still roided team. Miller over-rated

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