Thursday, April 21, 2016

Welcome to the 415 Media Deli

 *Jan Wahl: 42 ounce porterhouse with a couple baked potatoes and Yorkshire pudding, "hey waiter, can I get extra butter?"

*Liam Mayclem: mutton chops, pureed onion, garlic chips.

*Darya Folsom: 2 pancakes, lots of butter.

*Gasia Mikaelian: bowl of cheerios with a banana, extra soy milk in decaf coffee.

*Jana Katsuyama: a bowl of boiled kale; tofu scramble; glass of water.

*Ronnnnnnnnnnn Owens: toast.

*Brian Murphy: extra corned-beef sandwich with mayonnaise; potato salad imported from UCLA culinary institute; a cheesecake that when you take a bite, makes a sound like a human voice: "Go Giants, I love Lee Hammer."

*P-Con: extra crispy southern fried chicken; grits with mustard sauce and a 1-gallon vanilla milkshake with 8 glasses of Guinness and 3 cartons of American Spirit.

*Kate Scott: white rice, no salt. 1 rye crisp and soy seltzer because wifey likes same.

*John Lund: foot-long hotdog, rare.

*Damon Bruce: Buffalo stew, 3 shots of Hennessey and chocolate pudding.

*Chip Franklin: Atlantic salmon steak alone on a porcelain plate delivered express by My Rich Uncles.

*Gary Radnich: blackened pork chops with extra pepper and a Bentley-shaped bowl of asparagus --chocolate ice cream.

*Larry Krueger: home made enchiladas with a tub of butter and Felipe Alou's homemade chili sauce.

*Joe Hughes: day-old peanut butter sandwich left in the KNBR-Cumulus cafeteria by an intern named, "Spots".

*The 3 or 4 guys on the FM Sports-only station: baked Alaska --Juneau, to be precise. Market 289.

*Don Kollins: Montreal bagels; plain. Toasted too.

*Aaron Pero: Dungeness crab;  caught, November 2015.

*Jon Miller: Larry Baer's extra cha-cha bowl. Pound of garlic fries.

*Krukow: Larry Baer's extra ballpark cheeseburger and a KNBR intern named "Courtney."

*Kuiper: 600 bags of peanuts and Larry Baer's sloppy seconds.

*Flemming: Uh, Krukow's uneaten cheeseburger provided Larry Baer approves.

*Lee Hammer: A cheese pizza with sausage that looks like Larry Baer.

*Tracey Watkowski-Silva: Reggie Aqui's third Kasper's hotdog with some chips and a week's worth of tweets.

*Larry Baer: Every AT&T female usher and their kale salad (provided they paid for them)

*Brian Copeland: See's candy with Byron Allen autograph.

*Natasha Zouves: turkey on rye, lots of mayo.

*Lee Jones: pistachio soup with engineer chili. Miller's second beer.

*Tom Tolbert: every known beer ever served at McGhee's.

*Ray Ratto: 16 taco trucks parked outside 3rd street including the 4598 tacos inside. Ted Grigg's six-pack of Diet Coke.

*Audrey Cooper: a plain tuna sandwich with unedited Wonder bread.

*Rusty Simmons: Copy and Pasted linguini with clam sauce. Edited.

*Greg Papa: Raiderette Ravioli, Silver and Black spinach.

*Ross Palombo: Talk like a pirate eggs with plain oatmeal.

*Hank Schulman: "Fuck off, asshole!" toasted almonds; cup of ginger ale.

*Rich Lieberman: "Hey, can any of you people pop for a paid subscription to 415 Media?"

*Tim Kawakami: A blocked-Twitter cheese fondue with Lowell Cohn imitating Damon Bruce chowder.

*Mark Ibanez: Leslie Griffith high-heel artichoke heart salad with some spicy salsa.

*Fitz and Brooks: Less-time lasagna.

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  1. Karel: Heaping plate of Dog Crap covered in Hollandaise Sauce, served on driveway concrete. Could I have seconds, please?

  2. Heather Holmes: A bag of oats, a lump of sugar and a tossed "Hey, Did You Know I was Miss Texas" salad

  3. Lary Baer and Krukow both couldn't get laid in a monkey whore house with a semi trailer full of fresh bananas.

    1. Makes sense that Kruk is a ladies man. Scumbag. Big boi!!

  4. Oakland A's Announcers: Cheap bourbon as they hold their breaths hoping their paychecks don't bounce.

  5. Pauly Mac: The "how fast can you change the station when we play my song paradies" sandwich from Ike's.......bro

  6. For Rusty Simmons, the how I learned to plagiarize and story sandwich.

  7. For Gary Radnich, The how to do the gangster lean while driving a 71 Cadillac El Dorado. Coupe de Ville no less. Complete with 22 inch rims.

  8. Ray Woodson: A bowl of vanilla ice cream which the waitress forgets to bring.

    1. Non-fat, artificial flavoring

  9. Darya Folsom: Butter face

    Roberta Gonzales tried to hard to get the waiters attention...

  10. tom tolberts warriors post game beer and after post game beer micro and Budweiser and draft and beer. 6 pack to watch tivo'd games and relax...IPA's R-US ,fun bunch at the Tolbert lounge. jon miller ,a henry miller literary exercise and cultural trek to north beach for bread and pasta and scarcely a rememberance of another strange outcome of a ''giants'' ''game''. fuggedabout that one...pass the penne, paolo!

  11. Leslie Griffith: Meat, well done.

  12. Trixie got married? Really!

  13. What happened to Leslie Griffith?