Tuesday, March 29, 2016

SF Bay Area Media 2016 Assessment; Basically, All of You Suck; The Truth

 I HAVE A TROLL who sends me e-mail and repeated comments (duh!) that I concentrate too much on the past; that old-school media types that once broadcast in the Bay Area were not that great; in essence, move on, you asshole!

Well, for starters, you move on, asshole, I never put a gun to your head and make you read this, go torture yourself and listen to Murph and Mac on the KNBR "Morning Show."

The truth is you readers dictate the action here and I know you'll agree: what a pathetic market, what amateurs, what posers! Sure, nationwide is no different but the Bay Area is the clubhouse leader. We have so much shit here; a wasteland of pathetic losers; drug-infested jerkoffs who talk utter total nonsense and are nothing more than dime-store quislings --a 415 Media cesspool inundated with talent-impaired vermin who import pretend-to-be news and sports anchors devoid of craftsmanship and talent. Welcome to San Francisco.

Our radio is DEAD, long ago kidnapped by the Cloud Company broadcast mafia who KILLED the finest radio station in the world and whose prime cheerleader, the insufferable Ronnnnnnnnnnnnnn
Lowenstein Owens who today sounded like crap on KGOne Radio and has on a another no-talent hack; the boorish, obnoxious, cad, Jason Middleton, a South Bay heathen who has all the authenticity of a Union City Arbys.  Much better off, Jase, having affairs--your broadcasting is atrocious, I mean, it really does suck, pal. Ronnnnnnn has you on now because his other bitches, Copeland and Ryan Scott, are busy with their impending Modesto radio stardom, but keep kneeling, Jaaason.

SF MEDIA: wow, how awful. The Chronicle is wasting away; its prime function now is to pimp real-estate sites and click-bait its way to marginal traction; the print paper itself would be more useful to inherit the bird poop, but that would be disrespectful to all birds. A few months ago Hearst was sandwiched into propping up a lower-level female exec; she is now EIC and naturally the paper continues to suck and bleed red ink; Hearst seems to be fine with that because not only is the paper garbage, its rank and file hates Madame Cooper because she knows shit about the newspaper business and has the chutzpah to refer to bloggers as "no real journalists"; really, Audrey? Yeah, only real journalists copy and paste press releases and use them in the sports department, sorry, my bad.

I'M JUST GETTING STARTED...

Really, try as hard as I can, I've given up on KTVU. Forever condemned and dispensed to the Oakland Zoo and awaiting trial for charges of mass mutilation of a public institution --congratulations to you too, FOX, for doing to Channel 2 what Cumulus did to KGO: If it ain't broke, let's fix it! God, what geniuses --these are the same assholes who'd fuck up a wet dream if they could.

Yo, KPIX? It's really scary when one of your best anchors is Snow White. I think its time, Danno, for another experiment in the morning; maybe your hiring source-- Hawaii Craigslist --should be thrown out; it might be best to actually look at videos of your future talent. By the way, any more blonds or women of color reporters/anchors/weather guessers on the horizon? Doing real well in that category.

Vern Glenn? I love you man, but seriously ..Vern? Be YOU, VERN! Stop acting like the Bentley guy; it's grating on the eyes and ears; Dennis? God, it's a nice thing you're good looking otherwise you'd be selling shoes at the Walnut Creek Nordstrom, but hey, life is a miracle.

KGO-TV: Home of the 2016 "Steve and Eydie" show in the morning. I wonder if they'll TWEET that? Bill Burton, I heard the last time you wandered into the newsroom, George H. W. Bush was president...Now be careful, Trixie; it's about time for one of your best reporters to be snatched away by Kevin Keeshan --NBC Bay Area: your home for wayward former KGO employees.

KRON: Guilty on ALL charges: Execution Date: June 19, 2018. Televised and sponsored by the Gabe Wolenski Outdoor Furniture Store; BREAKING NEWS!: Aaron Pero has finally been axed and is headed for Al Jazeera Toleda as its HR manager.

HOLY COW, what a TOTAL DISASTER!
 

16 comments:

  1. Amen, Rich, Amen!! Testify!! The World is full of Fat Fucks (Karel) and a Whole Lot of ASS!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Can someone tell Mike Mibach to grab a bottle of windex and clean the seagull shit on the window behind him after todays noon broadcast?

    ReplyDelete
  3. BRAVO! BRAVO! It is what it is and Dickie nailed it down.

    For those of you who think Bay Area media is the bomb, you've been brainwashed. This market is one of the worst in the nation. Even the No. 100 market has more credibility than this place. There's no substance. Do it on the cheap. Do it with less.

    The Chronicle is a joke. It has zero substance. KGO Radio is a waste of natural resources. KCBS is heading down that path. They'll join KNBR which wallows in its own piss and shit.

    TV is no better.

    You have to be brain dead and dumb not to know this.

    Can't wait to see what the interns drum up to reply to this post...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Rich I can only agree.

    I continually wonder how long our republic will last with a marginally involved self absorbed techie electorate and loss of a free and independent press capable of criticizing what is wrong.

    Lately there is too much spin on the news AKA SF Gate-SF Chron. I wonder how long the Chron will be with us when it is full of BS and click bait. I was surprised to see the Merc in it's damaged condition has more SF news than The Chron does. The Chon should be left to rest in peace it died long ago when the hucksters from Hearst made the Examiner into the Chron.

    The same can be said for KTVU's activist bent on news coverage I'm suprised KTVU does not have a Bake Sale to honor the at large thug who murdered the guy on BART a month ago. With their spun news stories only Oakland thugs have rights the rest of us are merely prey. I'm hopeful advertisers will start abandoning KTVU in protest. I wonder how long the few good journalists at KTVU will remain. Some of the best of them seem to have a hard time showing up very much lately - but then there is always Gasia babbling and acting out to fill in. I was going to send Gasia some Beno so she could settle down. So cute and so bloated with blab.

    For news I'm looking to new sources Hoodline is apparently where the Chron and Examiner get their leads. It is more professional than either of them if you overlook the help out locals "ad stories", It better covers the grit you need to know in SF to help you be safe. Between Hoodline, the Merc and a little from the Examiner I don't need the Chronicle anymore.

    Anyone who was lucky enough to experience old San Francisco or a kinder Bay Area back in the old days will be disappointed in what it has become. The media is just a reflection of this.

    I totally gave up on KPIX after the Super Bawl - I honestly like Ken but he is not enough to carry the station by himself the AM show is so bad I skip it. The same can be said for KTVU although I once respected it their pro thug stance on everything only detracts from what is good in the community.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. > I honestly like Ken

      Dumber than a shoehorn, and doesn't know it.

      Delete
  5. "Really, try as hard as I can, I've given up on KTVU. Forever condemned and dispensed to the Oakland Zoo" ... really? The Oakland Zoo is of too high a quality to accept these animals. Perhaps they're better sent to replace the elephant shows at the circus.

    ReplyDelete
  6. What happened to Ronn, he was off for 9 days and came back with his arm in a cast and had stiches on his chin?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Probably another fall. Time for Ronnnn to hang it up. His best days are behind him

      Delete
  7. When KNTV, which not so long ago was a smaller-market station whose signal barely made it past San Mateo and whose most prominent advertiser was a VCR store in San Jose, . emerges as the standard of Bay Area TV excellence, that is saying something. I'm not sure what...but something.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Here's my list of annoying bay are media personalities, in not particular order, (because they all suck!)

    Bob Fitzgerald. A toadying, ass-kissing, disingenuous horse's year end of the first degree. This guy sold his soul, knifing Greg Papa in the back to get his dream job, and had his dad sucked off Tony Salvadore to get Fitzie a regular gig on KNBR.

    Mark Ibanez. Lazy, no talent hack who puts both ZERO effort and has the most lame close in local TV: "That's the sporting life!" Give me an offing break!

    Amy G. Her whiny, nasally, valley girl voice is annoying enough, but you think after so many years in front of the camera she might have learned SOMETHING about baseball. Sadly, she hasn't and Giants' fans watching the games on TV are subjected to her inane prattles on a regular basis.

    The PA screamer at the Warriors game: Franco Finn. This guy thinks he's entertaining, but he's not. He's giving everyone a headache. STFU you worthless loser!

    Gary Radnich, 'the Bentley Guy.' Never goes to games because he's not into sports. His favorite expression is: "Nobody cares." NO GARY, YOU don't care!

    Henry Wofford. Nice guy, but is that voice really his? He sounds like he's a walking advertisement for one of those old radio schools.

    Murph and Mack. Their inane, frat-boy chatter is annoying enough, but then Mack, who was a second string DJ and working in Sacramento part time when KNBR picked him up, is a fish out of water when it comes to sports. "Dude!" also appears to be his favorite word. And BTW Murphy, we know you went to UCLA. Enough of the Bruin references, okay?

    Damon Bruce. Acts as if he knows EVERYTHING about bay area sports and that his own farts didn't smell. Still acts that way, although he's not fooling ANYONE.

    John Lund. Really get tired of his constant penis jokes, but what's even worse is when Greg Papa encourages him to behave in this juvenile manner. Another brilliant hire by the former 'Game' PD Kevin Barrett.

    Jennifer Jones-Leigh. This giggling valley-girl is the queen of trash-news radio. 'Nuff said.

    That's enough for now. But there are plenty of other frauds out there, too many to mention. Hope you like my list Rich.

    ReplyDelete
  9. In hindsight, the de Youngs were wise to cash out and dismantle their Bay Area media empire, Chronicle Publishing, in 2000.

    The media industry has become the province of mega corporations, and media itself is caught in a vicious cycle where quality is not demanded, and it has no monetary value regardless.

    But it's undeniable that the result of their actions served to not only irreparably damage a television station, KRON, but also two newspapers, the Chronicle and the Examiner.

    One might argue that the winds were blowing that way already, but handing KRON and the Chron over to Young, and Hearst, respectively, didn't do them any favors.

    NBC made good on their threats, and doomed the once-mighty KRON to a sad outlet of syndication, reruns, infomercials, and a self-important blowhard sports anchor.

    Hearst discarded the Examiner by shoving it out the door, with a "Take Me" sign taped to it...and a pile of cash...which the Fangs couldn't resist.

    Without any sort of local investment and community leadership, it’s no surprise that TV, print, and now radio is nothing more than whatever pablum the large corporations wish to spew forth, with a keen eye on the stock price.

    Even in its heyday, the Chron was really a second-class newspaper, but at least it did a decent job of covering local happenings, and dropping a good, in-depth story occasionally in front of the local columnists. Now? Despite its own struggles, the LA Times does a better job of covering the big local stories, from 400 miles away.

    Local TV news can be summed up thusly — a few headlines…weather (often flip-flopped)…story about animal in distress or abused…weather…plug for a parent company property…weather…idiotic, entitled consumer seeking shaming help…weather…a national headline, if there’s enough time…sports…done. They could hire monkeys from the zoo to read the teleprompters, and it would make little difference. Probably much cheaper, too. So those of you with talking monkeys hidden in your basements, take note -- Disney, CBS and NBCUni would like to speak with you.

    Radio? I have little time for it. With instant and easy access to massive music catalogs, who listens to terrestrial radio any more, where you’re force fed repetitive playlists via payola, sprinkled with commercials? Talk radio never had appeal to me, but great if you can find an intelligent discussion instead of the typical self-reinforcing circle jerk.

    I do like sports, so that means KNBR, the all-commercials station that sprinkles in some sports sometimes, does have a preset on my dial, for when a game is on. That makes it easy to avoid the Frat Boys and King-in-his-own-mind Radnich in the AM, plus the Village Idiots of Notre Dame in the early PM. The Jock and the Curmudgeon are tolerable in small doses, and I like Marty Lurie.

    Speaking of sports, the so-called “coaching tree” not only applies to the teams, but to the broadcasters.

    Some may be unaware that Dennis O’Donnell was Radnich and Glenn’s producer at KRON, when their egos were in check, they gave a shit, and actually did their jobs and read the scores, instead of pontificating on whatever BS is on their minds, or making stupid jokes with the co-anchors.

    So, with O’Donnell not content to be in the background, you’ve got all three of them on air. Thankfully, the damage is confined to KRON and KPIX. Such a legacy...

    ReplyDelete
  10. For those who think the Chronicle is weak today -- yes, all newspapers are shrinking and narrowing -- they might go to the library microfiche and see what it was in the 1960s and 1970s -- a sheet with attention-grabbing headlines, a lot of sensation and (the hint of) sex, provocative columns, meant to pick up on the newsstands and enjoy. This was the paper that prominently ran "Tales of the City" every day. But it should be said that the writing was excellent -- by comparison today's Mercury News reads like a high-school newsletter.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well said, and outside of the great Bruce Jenkins is there any notable writer/reporter left from before the tragic sale of the Chron to Hearst? That was the first local institution to fall and it opened the gates for the demise of all our other media outlets. Was it already 15 years ago!?

      Delete
    2. Dang! I knew there must be someone who read the crusty, insufferable, Bruce Jenkins. And here he is!
      Unless he is the "great Bruce Jenkins" himself.
      As I recall, Ray Ratto and CW Nevius both antedate the ChronEx merger.

      Delete
  11. I'm trying to recall anyone among the Bay Media who wasn't afraid to blast itself before Lieberman has done this decade. The only journalist I can think of was the TV Critic who worked at the Tribune, then Press Democrat. I don't know if Bill Mann is still writing up in Santa Rosa, but it would be interesting to see Rich & Bill debate the state of Bay Media as a whole. They may sound similar.

    ReplyDelete
  12. "authenticity of a Union City Arbys". Ouch! I'll bookmark that phrase...

    -Oakland Dave

    ReplyDelete