Really wanted to post a story tonight, but was called late and was begged, forklempta, begged to walk the red carpet at the Plotsky Theatre in the Tenderloin--where the new musical, "Guilty for Gefelte Fish" opens tonight! The producer called, and I'm like, what's an entertainer like me to do? I told Mr. Golderwyer that I wanted this all my life and so, yes, here I come.
Like buttah! I'm forklempt! And please, honey, when coming down, keep in mind, it's FREE!
You do know I AM a celebrity and have always dreamed of a walk down the red carpet, honey! In fact, if you really want to get a glimpse of me, stop on by and do take pictures. If you can't make it, the local access channel, "Budda Budda" will televise it and it can be seen soon. You will witness me and my dream of not only posting the news, not merely behind the ropes, NOW!, on the other side--OMG! Honey!
The Red Carpet? I'm forklempt! Please...stop and cease what you're doing and join me. You will never forget this special night and I walk down the blogger lane and show you all my fantastic girth! Got that, honey? Better than buttah!
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Hahaha!! One of your funniest posts yet. Hilarious!
ReplyDeleteWhere is KRON's Jackie B.? They have a guy named Fletcher doing the weather all week. Is she gone or just on vacation? Sorry this has nothing to do with the red carpet, but it needs an answer.
ReplyDeleteI agree. Jackie has grown on me....
DeleteSounds like "I AM KAREL" !!!
ReplyDeleteI'm sure Pat Thurston is quite jealous.
ReplyDelete- TT
Screamingly funny, sweetheart honey! Oh, Richie, you are just so damn FUNNY! A shame they don't even have a red carpet at the Razz Room, or I would squarely have you ON IT WITH ME!
ReplyDeleteOh, my health. When I'm sad with guilt for being an "entertainer" and I take on Chevron or Wells Fargo or that evil Mitt Romney and the equally evil Paul Ryan ... it just wears me out. I just want to go and kick off my heels and plop just from the stress. I massage my sorry worn out vocal node, pet the dogs and dream. Just dream of when I, Karel the "entertainer" will again be on the red carpet with my fame of celebrity which so many are so jelous.
I'd do it for anyone. Supermarket openings, motorcycle shops, head shops (oh baby!) and progressive radio station lobbies where I get thrown out on my ass except at, for now KGOhmygod!
You haters. And Pat Thurston didn't do another transition with me last night. I think she must think I am such a bitch! Well bring it on honey! I am an ENTERTAINER. I MUST talk about ME! The world of Chevron revolves around ME because I propose that you stupid morons below me save energy by buying, renting, stealing, trading or reviewing two-wheel motorized transportation like I DO!
There. I have saved the world. I pay $15 for three gallons of gas for 300 plus miles. Suckers.
I AM Karel and don't you pick on me for my name. At least it's not Squirt from Petaluma!
See ya, wouldn't wanna be ya!
Great interpretation of the way the narcissistic one carries himself. Every issue is about HIM. Refinery fire? It is about his motorcycles. Medical pot? It is about his recent dizzy spells. Nutrition? It is about his dead husband's culinary skills....
DeleteOh, Karel Darling, you'd show up for the opening of an envelope, wouldn't you?
ReplyDeleteNow, that there 9:23am is freaking Comedy Gold! Well done! I agree with 10:00s comments too. Well said. The post before along with Rich's blog are hoots and so smack-on true. Well done.
ReplyDeleteI'm told, "The only thing keep Karel at the station is the fact he doesn't work at the station. If he did they'd never have let him back in." - Roy
ReplyDeleteFirst off everyone, it's "I EM KAREL." The half-wit from Long Beach wouldn't now a soft a"" if it hit him in his rather rotund ass.
ReplyDeleteSecond...Rich...I bow to you, sir. That right there was comedic GOLD! Stupendous! Tremendous!
-Wayne
I walked (and spilled some Pepsi) on the red carpet at the Century 20 Daly City when I went to see "Total Recall". Does that make me a "stah"?
ReplyDeleteAre we having fun yet???
ReplyDeleteKarel is annoying in so many ways; however he is at his worst during interviews. His constant interruptions are so grating. Let your damned guests answer the questions without constantly barging in! Btw did anyone catch the start of his show today? He addressed the issues raised in this forum. Very defensive...
ReplyDeleteAgain, let's stop all of this talk and nonsense about the one who irritates the most: KAREL. The guy is a no-talent hack who is obviously deluded into thinking people actually like listening to him.
ReplyDeleteThe fact that he's even on local radio speaks volumes for how far the industry as fallen. Kooks such as Karel would have been considered a joke on the air just ten years ago! It's indicative of how far this country has fallen.
I couldn't agree with 8:45pm more. Karel is enjoying his '15 minutes of fame,' but he'll be discarded and long-forgotten by the broadcasting industry within a few years after suffering some sort of mental breakdown. The poor guy isn't all there and shame on KGO for putting on the radio a man who is mentally ill!
ReplyDelete