Ronn oh Ronn.
The cynic in me says the "Up to 30" segment was staged. You had to know people were, sooner or later, going to bring up the fact how much KGO sucks these days, Ron--that's you're real name, not the affectation-littered "Ron with two 'n's" you so gleefully told me about when your ego was about the size of Tahoe way back when.
I finally heard your bullshit, Ron, Mr. Lowenstien, again, let's make it real.
"We were slipping, (in the ratings)", Ronnnnn told a caller on Tuesday.
Yeah, speaking of ratings, how's those ratings looking today, Ronnnnnn? I mean, slippin? Shit, like the Titanic?
"They've treated me really well, "Lowenstein told his audience. "I like this format." Excuse me while I vomit.
OK, I'm really charged up and have a lot to say but since most of you know how I feel already it's useless to dredge up past misery. If you want misery, listen to Owens and his distinct brand of bullshit radio, his tangy largess of Cumulus-inspired dog doo placed directly in front of the 55 Hawthorne cluster.
Owens, I feel sorry for you.
They all know. You know it. I know it. Fuck the 8 million ads and listen up a bit. You really pulled a fast one Tuesday; the problem is, Ronnnnnnnnnn, that those in the biz who know what really happened; your peers know, the fired hosts know, everybody on the universe knows, Mickey, Jack, they all know.
The day after the massacre you were so shocked and taken aback you devoted 15 minutes to the albatross before being hijacked by Jared and talking about cellphones. Maybe it's you that's slippin.
We know, Ron, that "KGO will never be back." You didn't have to tell us, we knew that already, it's old business. Old, as in, why did it take you, Ronnnnnnnnnn, two years to address all this? Did you suddenly have a guilt trip? Was the Mayor of Union St so consumed with frail hurt that he decided to pull a stunt to take homage with a wide swath of listeners who long ago left the radio Titanic to carry on and pull past the captain from 9-Noon.
Ron, get past the bullshit. Stop making me the culprit. I didn't give a flying fuck about you, your contract, your work. Really. Tell the truth. It was YOU, Ronnn, that did the dirty deed. You could have said the same bullshit, lame and utterly fucked-up as it is and was, two years ago and probably would have escaped the wrath from your listeners. Instead, you cowered. You retreated into the deep abyss of dirty Lake Lowenstein.
Gene Burns would have raked your ass over the coals and you know it. Wattenberg already has and you know what he thinks of you--I know you know. You seem to think, Ron, that they wanted you back. Really now? Ronn, tell the truth. They wanted you back BECAUSE you took a pay cut and were willing to work for less than a third of what you were making. You told Gene that you were ready to retire and fuck this Cumulus company but you ended up going back because you need to pay the mortgage and that's fine, OK, Ronn, nobody really gives a shit now because, like you said, they really treat ME good. I mean, they killed Gene Burns; did you hear, Ronnnnnnnnn, how, when Gene collapsed when the lady in the black skirt talked with the hosts in the back and gave them their last check? Did you call Gene? Did you, between playing with your 66 "gadgets", have the heart to call "Mr Burns" and inquire of his well-being? Certainly, the added stress, the amazing ultra-anxiety may have played a part in his last stroke and ultimate undoing, but you were too busy being "treated so swell" by the company.
"I'm tired of you all taking shots at our news dept--we got some damn, hard-working people and ...."Shut up Ron. Stop the bullshit. Nobody believes you anymore, even the 30-something housewife in Pleasanton you talk to knows the story. For you, Mr. Lowenstein, to DEFLECT the attention away from the real juggernaut of this is typical you. You, Mr EGO-central. You don't give a shit about the news people, the directors, the writers, the engineers, the interns, you care about one thing and that's you, and that's fine, we all gotta make a living but spare us the bullshit about the people taking out their venom on the little people in the back.
You prided yourself on not being told what to say. You were emphatic that the day they, (whomever), you were told what to say you would leave. YOU said it, not me. You took the last payday so you could get 40 years at KGO and a trip to the radio HOF. That's cool, why didn't you say that two fucking years ago? Why were you even on the air? Who made that call? And how on God's Earth could you have the chutzpah to proclaim on that day that "this is gonna be a great new format!" Shit, even I couldn't do that and I'm one pretty anxious and unpredictable motherfucker.
Owens, you are one cowering turd. "This is the last time I'm going to talk about this." Really? You think they care anymore? Honestly, they're wise to you. They know, like I told you. They have proof positive of what you are and what you aren't. They know, for example, that you repeatedly shunned their thirst for opening up about what happened--I know because I get regular e-mail from them. They know you and your boy, Jared, ran roughshod over them for the better part of two years; that you censored their calls, that you concealed the misery from not only them, but some of the news people in the back office you talked about so piously on the air. Too bad you used them as fodder for a gimmick that really didn't work, your bullshit, sanctimonious drivel aside.
Nobody expected you to quit. You were "under contract." Nobody ever predicted you would be a hero and stand up for your fallen colleagues because that's just so not you. You fucked up bad. You even said it on the radio Tuesday, gimmick and all. "Should have handled it better", no shit, Sherlock!
I'm just getting started. Everybody in the industry knows what happened, Ronno, and that's fine. The guys in the suits and those at the cocktail party don't really get too involved with listener feedback, listener loyalty, the people, the little old lady in Burlingame who depended on KGO before it became kgo. They care about demos, they care about the bottom line and yes, you was slippin. You needed a change, the station too, but what has that transpired into TODAY?
Your station used to have 10-15 AE's, (acct. execs); what do you have today? 2, 3, maybe 4? You billed about $40-50 million, 25, lowest at the time of the massacre--how much you billing today? You could have tweaked the format; hired a few new, younger voices and added some depth to the operation and picked up some steam. Instead, Ronno, your "great company" took the dog out in the backyard and shot it. God knows Cumulus knows really how to run a radio station. Aren't they great!
Ronn, you could have leveled with the base. Your listener. Your average Volvo driver, about 55, buys travel trips, takes a lot of vacation, (almost as much as you), buys cars and eats at expensive restaurants and purchases IPhones and computers? Remember that demo? Talk about fuckin' with the core demo!
You didn't level, Ronn, Face it. You hid and cowered like the toad, the shill, the real corporate tool you officially became and still are today, and again, that's fine as long as you so much admitted to it but you're so incapable of being transparent. I mean, look, nobody's perfect--even me. I have some loose lips and sink ships in me and I fully acknowledge it, seriously, as you know Ronn, but I never cowered like you did. And see, that's the thing. You always told me privately that you respected your listener base. We had lunch only a few weeks before, at Grumpy's across the street; we were shooting the breeze. It was one of your rare moments when you acted with a degree of modesty and injected humor into a somewhat dreary day.
You still wonder Ronn, why I have issues? I don't have issues. Never. You know that. Tell em. I don't have an agenda either but you seem to think I do/did. Bullshit. And you know it.
What I do have issues with is the manner in which you handled the whole thing. I could care less about kgo anymore since kgo has been essentially drecked down to wallpaper these days. Yes, Ronnnnn, there's GOOD PEOPLE who work there. A few news people in the back who hate your ass and a few who don't care anymore because they just show up to work and hope to avoid the wrath, the pink slip, the garbage spewed forth by the company that "treats you so beautifully."
Ronn, you can fool some people some of the time but you can't fool all the people all the time.
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